Perhaps you already know, but whether you choose to believe it or not, your gray hair is beautiful!
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As a gray hair specialist, it is my duty to learn as much as I can about the subject so that I can help clients. It does help to actually have gray hair, as well as hair that is thick, curly and coarse- but I also need help to keep this mane under control, so I learn new things all the time to make it happen!
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PAGES ON THIS WEBSITE
This page is about caring for your gray hair- whether it's all natural, artificially grayed, or colored, using the knowledge that I've gathered. Below is an index of some other pages I've put together regarding gray hair transformation and blending, as well as a little bit of insight from my own personal experience with gray transformation:
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FACEBOOK GROUPS
A very helpful resource online is the Facebook group called Going Gray All The Way. If you're on Facebook, I highly recommend joining this group for support, and to learn what others are going through on their Gray Hair Journeys. Another good group is Silver Hair and Proud! If your hair is gray and also curly, there's Curly Silvers. There are several other groups, but I'm a member of the three mentioned above and participate in discussions fairly regularly- maybe I'll see you in there!
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OTHER RESOURCES
Gray hair is chic and trendy! Many are embracing their natural color these days, so there are tons of YouTube videos, Instagram posts, and TikTok viral videos out there, and I'm sure you've seen at least a few. A stylist with a gray hair specialty is still somewhat of a new concept, but there are more emerging celebrity stylists who are showcasing their work and educating the masses as well. My favorites are Jack Martin and Emily Chen.
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There's never been a better time to have gray hair! If you're reading this, it's likely because you are ready to embrace your glitter strands, or are at least thinking about it. I recommend following that instinct because I haven't read or heard anyone say that they regret it yet! However, I have heard several say that they regret coloring again because of peer pressure or being self-conscious, so if you have someone in your life that has discouraged you or might try to discourage you from being your natural, fabulous self, I recommend tuning them out- even if it's your own reflection in the mirror!
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Gray hair comes with its own set of very unique challenges, but every gray hair equals another level up in wisdom and confidence, so you've got this!
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The less frequent, the better! Once a week is optimal, with daily brushing in between washes. If currently washing every day, try to gradually space out washes to every other day for a few weeks to a month, then every 2-3 days for a few weeks to a month, and repeat this process until down to one wash per week. Rinsing the hair on non-wash days can help lessen the icky feeling, just go through the motions of shampooing without the actual shampoo! Dry shampoo can help space out wash days a little farther!
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If the hair or scalp is very oily, reducing shampooing frequency may help the scalp regulate sebum (oil) production, as frequent washing forces the scalp to overproduce sebum to compensate for the moisture loss shampooing creates. It's more common for the scalp to become more dry as more gray appears, since it coincides with the scalp producing less sebum, so in this case the scalp becomes too dry because sebum production can't catch up.
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For gray that has been colored: Using professional shampoos and conditioners- preferably those designed specifically for color treated hair- increases the chances of a good hair day. Professional brands may cost more than the drugstore variety (but not by much these days) and they are typically of higher quality- meaning you use less to get the same or better results. This shampoo and conditioner is what I use on my own hair (even though I don't color my hair anymore- I absolutely love the fragrance)!
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For gray that has been blended with highlights: There are toning shampoos and conditioners that will help maintain light, neutral shades, to platinum, silver or gray shades, in between salon appointments. These should be used no more than once a week if shampooing daily to every few days, or every other wash if shampooing weekly. Corresponding conditioners for neutral and platinum/silver/gray, or any conditioner made for color-treated hair can be used as well.
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For natural gray hair: A moisturizing shampoo and conditioner system will help keep frizz and flyaways at bay. Sometimes gray can take on a yellow tinge- this is caused by sun/UV ray exposure, smoking, medication, and mineral deposits. Typically, a purple shampoo and conditioner system can help neutralize yellow tones, but in cases of stubborn yellow due to mineral deposits, a clarifying, detoxifying, or deep cleansing shampoo should be used to remove buildup. If these methods don't work, a toner can be applied in the salon to neutralize yellow and add shine.
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Since natural gray hair as well as color-treated or highlighted hair tends to be dry, regular deep conditioning treatments are game changers for all! They can be used as often as desired, but at least once a month should be the minimum. If the hair is feeling particularly dry or flyaway, try substituting a deep conditioning mask for regular conditioner.
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Even after using regular conditioner or a deep conditioning mask, it's a good idea to apply a leave-in conditioner to the hair after towel-drying to add more moisture. A leave-in conditioner for fine hair sounds counterintuitive, but will help prevent over-drying, which leads to breakage (and thinning of the hair). A leave-in conditioner for thick or textured hair helps to detangle and reduce frizz. On hair that is going to be heat-styled, a leave-in conditioner with heat protection is a must!
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Cool to lukewarm water helps smooth the cuticle to lock in color or toner. I know its harder in the winter months not to step into a piping hot shower, but try your best! Hot water depletes moisture.
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San Antonio has some pretty hard water... If there isn't a water-softening system in the home, I recommend investing in a shower filter to soften at least the shower water. There are many benefits to the skin, hair, and even the shower/bathtub! Here are links to shower filters:
​AquaBliss High Output Revitalizing Shower Filter
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Swimming... it's hard not to try to cool off in Texas, but chlorinated water and salt water can do terrible things to gray, color-treated or lightened hair! Keep the hair above water if possible, but if going all in, wet the hair first, saturate it with conditioner and braid it, or wear a swimming cap. These won't 100% prevent the negative effects, but will definitely reduce them.​
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Don't forget to brush, brush, BRUSH! Brushing helps move the oils off of the scalp and get it to the ends where it's needed (plus, it feels great and is good for blood circulation in the scalp). I recommend a brush that has flexible bristles that won't snag or pull on the hair.
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​Again, heat is the enemy! Blow drying and using a hot iron (especially when using both) can fade color faster, not to mention dry the hair out. Hot irons can even turn gray hair yellow! Air dry whenever possible, and if blow drying is absolutely necessary, use the coolest setting possible, or wait until the hair has dried naturally (to about 75%) before blow drying. If still craving curls, let the hair air dry instead of blow drying before ironing so that the heat isn't doubled.
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One of my favorite tools of all time for my own hair- that dries, volumizes and lightly curls- comes in two sizes, and both have cool settings:
For shorter lengths (above shoulders)​
For longer lengths (past shoulders)
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With hot air stylers, letting the hair air-dry naturally to just lightly damp first (about 75% dry) prevents overexposure to heat, takes less time and adds more shine. These hot air stylers get HOT!
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Try heatless curl/wave methods to get a great finish that's friendlier to the tresses. Just search "heatless curls" on Google, YouTube or TikTok and there are a ton of tutorials!
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If it's impossible to put down the flat iron or curling iron, opt for a lower temperature (250-300 degrees), and thinner sections of hair.
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Every time heat is used to style, whether blow-drying or ironing, be sure to apply a heat protectant beforehand!
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Some styling products can cause color or toners to fade, such as those that contain larger amounts of alcohol or acidity. Some home "remedies" for dry hair, such as coconut oil and olive oil, actually penetrate the cuticle and push color out! Opt for professional brands of oils, creams and serums, or natural, pure oils that mimic natural scalp oils and sit on the surface of the hair to seal in moisture, such as argan oil or jojoba oil. Remember to clarify the hair if oils or products are used frequently, as over time they can build up and block out moisture.
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for trims: After some time, you'll notice your hair gets a little more tangled, a little more frizzy, flyaway, or flat, or just a little less cooperative in general... this is an indicator that it's time for a trim! The exact time frame is different for each individual, but on average, 3-5 weeks for shorter hair, 4-6 weeks for medium-length hair, and 6-8 weeks for long hair is a good time to start planning a salon visit for a trim!
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for toners: The lighter your hair was lifted, the faster your toners will fade. On average, between 4-6 weeks is a good time to refresh- if you're seeing any unwanted brassiness or fade- but if you shampoo less frequently or use a color refreshing shampoo at home, you can usually stretch the time frame out to 6-8 weeks.
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for gray blending lowlights: 6-8 weeks or longer, depending on your preference.
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for gray coverage: 3-6 weeks, depending on your preference
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for highlights: 6-8 weeks, depending on your preference
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for Balayage: 8-12 weeks or longer, depending on your preference​
I know life gets busy, and sometimes remembering when to book an appointment can get put on the back burner, but no worries! After a few visits, I will be able to create a custom reminder for you, based on your average visit frequency. Until then, I will be sending you a standard reminder, based on your individual services and preferences discussed upon your initial visit. You are welcome to book sooner or later than that at your leisure, of course. I look forward to seeing you again!
